Bois & gels, Relate! I just did. Thank you, Steve Martin! Excerpts from his bestselling book, Shopgirl:

He is on the prowl. He does not know her, he has only seen her. He has responded to something visceral. He only imagines the character that unites her clothes, her skin, and her body. He has imagined the pleasure of touching her. She is a feminine object that tweaks him at his animal best. Romantically, he is an adolescent. If he thinks he would harm her, he would back away. But he does not yet understand when and how people are hurt. His interest in her comes from the part of him that still believes he can have her without obligation. He believes that he can exist with her from eight to eleven and enter a private and personal world that they will create that will cease to exist in the off hours or off days. He believes that the world will be independent of other worlds he might create on another night, in another place, and he has no intention of allowing it to affect his true quest for a mate. He believes that in this affair, what is given back and forth will be exactly even, and that they will both see the benefits they are receiving. But because he picked her by sight alone, he fails to see that her fragility, which he smelled and sensed and is lured by, runs deep in her heart and is part of her nature, and cannot be separated out for him to fuck. He is now taking a remedial course in fucking 101, to learn how to handle the criticisms, inexplicable antics, insults, and misunderstandings that seem to him to be the inevitable conclusion to the syllogism of sex. But he is not aware that he is on such a serious mission. He thinks he is a bachelor having a good time.
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When he told her he's not ready for a real relationship for the moment but wanted to keep seeing her, she believes he has told her that he is bordering on falling in love with her, and he believes that she understands that he isn't going to be anybody's boyfriend. "I'm traveling too much right now," he says. In this sentence, he serves notice that he would like to come to town, sleep with her, and leave. She believes that he is expressing frustration at having to leave town and that he is trying to cut down on traveling. "So what I’m saying is that we should be allowed to keep our options open, if that's okay with you." At this point, he believes that he has told her that in spite of what could happen tonight, they are still going to see other people. She believes that after he cuts down on his traveling, they will see if they should get married or just go steady. So now they have had the Conversation. What neither of them understands is that these conversations are meaningless. The sayer believes they are heard, and the hearer believes they are never said.
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She is not sophisticated enough to understand what is happening to her and he is not sophisticated enough to know what he is doing to her. He tells her he is sorry he hurt her. And he is, but inside he doesn't know what he could have done differently. He is determined not to love her; she is not his peer. He knows that he is using her, but he isn't able to stop. And as powerful as their desire for each other remains, their conflicting goals stalemate them, and their relationship has failed to move forward. She has learned that her body is precious and it mustn't be offered carelessly ever again, as it holds a direct connection to her heart. After years, it happens to him. Someone else breaks his heart, and only then does he realize what he has done to her, how wanting a square inch of her and not all of her has damaged them both.