Maver: “Anong gagawin mo sa gym yang payat mong yan? Magkakalasug-lasog lang buto mo don!”
Me: “Di naman ako magbubuhat ng barbell eh!”
And so wit free special invites courtesy of Pam, Ruth, Felice, and I trudged to RCBC Plaza, Makati to work out for tha first time in our lives. At tha gym, so many complicated apparatuses [or is it apparati?] confronted us so that we went back to tha main entrance to try and see if we could exchange our tickets for use of spa instead. But apparently, we could not git away wit tryin to bum free massages from tha club. Only tha pool, tha Jacuzzi, and tha steam bath were open for use to our meek special guest selves which wuda been fine if only we remember’d to pack swimsuits. So it wuz back to tha gym. At tha gym, we started wit tha easiest-lookin gadget…tha treadmill. We moved on to swing-your-legs-forward gadget which wuz kinda like tha treadmill but wit separate swinging foothold fo’ each feet. Next, tha three of us went separate gadgets and juz tried on wutever looks ride-able to us. A scrawny trainer who made me doubt tha effectivity of their machines approach’d and assisted us on tha stranger lookin’ machines. Finding out that we’re new to tha practice, he lingered on & never really left tha area, makin’ sure to pass us every now & then. At one point, he beamed at me when he saw me approach an apparatus which read “glute” sumthin’. [ “Naku! Maganda yan! Para yan sa mga gustong magka-pwet! Pang-J.Lo yan! It will give you J.Lo butt! ] Tha J.Lo bum-giving apparatus turn’d out to be a real pain or at least not as fun as usin’ tha apparatus where you juz swing your arms forward in front of your face. Felice tried tha J.Lo bum apparatus soon as I dismounted. We diden want to exert our muscles or strain em in any way which wuz probably why tha longest we lasted on a gadget wuz five minutes [on tha treadmill], and wit one to two minutes on the other stranger gadgets. Ruth wanted to try aero & so we bid tha gadgets goodbye to attend aerobics class instead. I wuz expectin’ some overrated to-tha-left, to-tha-right mini stretching exercises like tha ones shown on fitness channels but wuz relieved when tha instructor taught us Usher-like dance steps instead. Later, he made us dance tha steps we’ve learn’d to tha tune of Where Tha Party At by J.E. At tha end of tha day, tha three of us agreed that we wuden mind joining a gym club someday although I strongly advise against workin’ out on an empty stomach. ‘Think tha insides of ma tummy were shoutin’ sumthin’ fierce while I moved it in its emptiness.